Tuesday, November 1, 2011

So Saddened

I got the call from my sister last week.  She said my mother had just called her to tell her...then she said "I can't say it".  I asked "Is he gone?".  She answered sadly, "yes".  And so started the tears for both of us.  The man that I still consider my brother in law, even though technically, he's my ex-brother-in-law, lost his battle to cancer on Oct. 26th.  He and my sister did not make happy husband and wife, but they remained best friends even after they divorced, raising an amazing daughter together.  My sister has remarried to a great guy, but my ex brother in law never left our family, being embraced by my current brother in law and acting as a second dad to their daughter.   He attended many family functions and gatherings with the rest of us.  He has been in my life for 31 years-that's a very long time when you're only 43.

He was an amazing person, giving, loving and filled with grace.  I will dearly miss him and shed so many tears over the loss of him in the past week I'm still surprised there are any left when they unexpectedly fall.  His wake was really a wonderful testament to his life, so many people came to honor him and say goodbye to such a grace filled spirit. Each knowing him in their own way, all loving him and filled with great stories of times spent with him.  His daughter, filled with sorrow and her own grace, paid wonderful tribute to him at his funeral. There was not a dry eye in the place.  He was such a great father to her, she was incredibly lucky to have had someone so supportive, warm, loving and kind.  And did I mention he also had a fabulous sense of humor?  He had a laugh that was very distinctive and fun.  Music Man said at one point when we were gathered at my sister's home after the wake, that he could hear his voice and laugh in the crowd.  I agreed, it's just the kind of gathering he would have very much embraced, all of us together enjoying each other's company.

So, I find a hole in my life, that I didn't even realize before now, that he filled.  I will never forget the man he was, the member of our family he remained and his bravery in the face of a horrible disease.   Grant, I will miss you for the rest of my days, and I will try to live more in your spirit-enjoying life to the fullest whenever possible.  Godspeed to you, my friend, brother and inspiration.  No, I will never forget you. 

Prayers to our departed, ~Peacemom


Dog Trot Farm said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Your brother in-law sounds like a wonderful human being. I am sure he would appreciate this lovely, heartfelt post. Sending Blessings, Julie.

small farm girl said...

So sorry to hear about your loss. It is never easy.